The coping that started as survival — and started costing more than it gave.
Substance use, over-functioning, overworking, the patterns we lean on when life asks more of us than we have. We work with all of it — without shame, without a script.
What it actually looks like
Addiction rarely walks in alone. It travels with grief, trauma, anxiety, identity shifts, relationship wounds, and the quiet exhaustion of holding yourself together for everyone else. By the time someone reaches out, most have already tried very hard on their own — and are tired of the version of themselves they have to be to keep it up.
How I work with it
From there, we look at the underneath: relational trauma, attachment patterns, unprocessed grief, the parts of you that learned coping was the only way through. We work with abstinence, harm-reduction, and everything in between — your goals, named and held with care.
Addiction & recovery therapy by location
For local details, see addiction & recovery therapy in Temecula or addiction & recovery therapy in Murrieta.
What it actually looks like.
Some of what people bring in:
A relationship with alcohol or substances that's quietly outgrown its usefulness
The “high-functioning” version — work, achievement, helping, control
Early sobriety: the rawness, the relationships, the rebuilt identity
Long-term recovery that's stable but no longer enough
Family-of-origin patterns around substances, secrecy, or rescuing
The shame loop that makes the coping harder to put down
What to expect
Sessions are 50 minutes, weekly, via secure telehealth. We'll spend the first few getting clear on what you actually want — not what you think you're supposed to want. We'll map the function of the coping, identify the supports already in your life, and build the rest in.
I won't pretend to be neutral about your wellbeing — I'm rooting for you. I also won't pretend recovery is a straight line. We'll keep showing up, with honesty and without shame, for as long as it's useful.
Common questions.
- Do I have to be sober to start?
- No. We meet you where you are — curious, ambivalent, newly sober, in long-term recovery, or somewhere in the gray. The work is about understanding the function of the coping, not gatekeeping the door.
- I'm not sure my use is 'bad enough' to be a problem.
- That doubt is almost universal, and it isn't a disqualifier. If a coping behavior is starting to cost more than it gives — sleep, energy, intimacy, self-trust — that's enough to bring in.
- Do you only work with substances?
- No. We also work with the addictive patterns that aren't substances — overworking, over-functioning, food, screens, compulsive helping. The medicine isn't in the substance; it's underneath it.
- Is this 12-step based?
- I respect every pathway. The work is integrative — not tied to any single model. You bring what's working for you (a program, a sponsor, harm-reduction, abstinence) and we build around it.